Telemarketing Tips

There are so many ways to sell things.
We can use multimedia such as TV, radio, magazines and so on to promote our products or use direct system, says door to door salesman.

There is one system abroad which is popularly called telemarketing.
The way it works is that the company hired so many people to sit in front of the telephone all day and then they randomly call people who are on the list and try to sell the company products.

Well, in my opinion that marketing system is so annoying!
Frankly, I never like a telemarketer.

I just had enough with them back there in Boston.
I mean, how could you help it if every day in almost every hour somebody just call your number and then you realized that it’s only a telemarketer who offered something that you didn’t need.

If it’s not bad enough, imagine that in the middle of your nap suddenly the phone rings and doesn’t want to stop ringing until you pick it up and it turns out that the one who dialed your number is a telemarketer who offers a credit card or try to sell a cream for selulite?

And the worst part is that in Indonesia, especially in Bandung –the city where I live- now a days there are so many company which have a marketing system by using a telemarketer.

Yes, it is really really really annoying.

So, i just write down the tips that you can use if a telemarketer tries to bother you at home.


1. If they want to offer you a loan, tell them you just filed for bankcruptcy and you could sure use some money.

2. If they start with, “ How are you today?” say, “Why do you want to know?”. Alternatively, you can tell them, “ I’m so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my cat just died ...”. When they try to get to the sell, just keep talking about your problems.

3. If they say they’re John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.

4. This works great if you are male: Telemarketer:”Hi, my name is Cindy and i’m with XYZ Company ...” You: wait for a second and with a real husky voice ask,” What are you wearing?”

5. Cry out in surprise, “ Cindy! Is that you? Oh, my God! Cindy, how have you been?” Hopefully, this will give Cindy a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where the hell she could know you from.

6. Say,”No”, over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each one, and keep a rhytmic tempo, even as they are trying to speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up.

7. If the company cleans rugs, respond: “Can you get out blood? Can you get out GOAT blood? How about HUMAN blood?”

8. After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, thel them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

9. Tell the telemarketer that yu work for the same company, they often can’t sell to employees.

10. Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a telemarketer, set the receiver down, shout or scream”Oh,my God!!!!” and then hang up.

11. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask them if they will give you their phone number so you can call them back. When the telemarketer explains that they cannot give out their home number, you say,”I guess you don’t want anyone bothering yuo at home, right?” The telemarketer will agree and yu osay,” now you know how I feel!” Hang up.

12. Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times.
13. Tell them it is dinner time, but ask if they would please hold. Put them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your dinner conversation.

14. Tell the telemarketer yo are on ‘home incarceration’ and ask if they could bring you some beer.

15. Ask them to fax the information to you, and make up a number.

16. Tell the telemarketer, “ Okay, I will listen to you. But I should probably tell you,I’m not wearing any clothes.”

17. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Jake, playing a joke. “ Come on, Jake! Cut it out! Seriously, Jack, how’s your momma?”

18. Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to speak up ... louder ... louder ... louder ...

19. Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY, because you want to write EVERY WORD DOWN.

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